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BOOM! NYC

A bomb went off in New York City on Saturday night.  Mayor Wilhelm, Wilhelm figured out that it was “intentional” but he concluded it was not “terrorism” so you can all relax out there.  Don’t worry.  Nothing is going on here.  Of course you have to be on the lookout for all those unintentional bombs like the ones in New Jersey.  A couple of them just went boom!.  But unintentional bombs are nothing to worry about.  They’re unintentional.  They don’t mean it.  Not sure about you but we feel better.  Well some of us here do, others don’t.  But don’t you break a sweat over it.

Go about your business.

Go to work.  Go to the park.  Go to the ball game.  And, most of all, go shopping.

Don’t worry, be happy.

Okay ISIS or ISIL whichever you prefer, is celebrating the Dumpster Bomb as it is now known because it was left in a Dumpster.  But just relax that doesn’t mean they have anything to do with the actual planting or detonating of the Dumpster Bomb.  I mean if you’re ISIS or ISIL whichever you prefer, celebrating bombs going off, is what you do.  And, especially in New York City.  It’s sort of like a hot Saturday night out for them.  Better than dinner and a movie.  But don’t worry about it.  Just move along.  There’s nothing to see.  There’s nothing going on here.

Go about your business.

Go to work.  Go to the park.  Go to the ballgame.  And, most of all, go shopping.

Don’t worry, be happy.

And, they’ve arrested the main suspect!  And, his name is A_____ K___ R______.  We’re not spelling out the guy’s name as we don’t want to offend anyone.  Oh yeah they also arrested five other guys and when their names are released we won’t spell them out either.  But the NYPD and the FBI are pretty sure they’re the guys involved in the bombings and that’s both the intentional and the unintentional ones.  Some people are a little worried because the FBI is involved and who knows what they’re up to but others have pointed out that the NYPD is also on the case.  So don’t worry.  Now Cynthia Caruso our intrepid reporter asks.  “If it’s not international terrorism could it just be some guys out for a walk who decided to kill some Americans?”  And we must admit that is a possibility but either way, it’s all over.  And, the President has now spoken.  He said that the ISIL he always calls them ISIL, want to kill innocents and instill fear in Americans.  Why they do this, he didn’t get into but then neither he nor anyone else ever does.  But he’s proud of us because.  “Americans are resilient and won’t give into fear.”  You see.  There’s nothing to worry about.  You’re resilient and if you have fear, you won’t give in to it.  So fuggettaaboutit!

Go about your business.

Go to work.  Go to the Park.  Go to the ballgame.  And, most of all, go shopping.

Don’t worry, be happy.

Dicens simile factum est
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9 comments to BOOM! NYC

  • Don, you’ve got to admit that the bomb explosion in the dumpster COULD have been unintentional — the suspect whose name we won’t mention might have thrown it in there thinking he didn’t put it together correctly. After all, one or two of the other bombs were defective, and the guy is so dumb he took a snooze in the doorway of a bar in the aftermath of this crimes….obviously, neither his head nor some of his bombs were screwed on right.

    • She hasn’t tried to hide it Lew, but she hasn’t really made news of it either… which happens a lot with this group. Issue a press release late on a Friday afternoon useably,pruferally there would be a long weekend on the Monday following, which allows all of it to pass by quite un-noticed by those going about their typical weekend business. Government banks on releasing potentially “bad” news for them, on Fridays, releasing “good” news on Mondays or early in the week to allow maximum potential for working those ops.

    • Finalmente saiu dos cinemas…agora espero ansiosamente por uma qualidade boa…e sei onde baixar…no melhor site de filmes…YES FILMES!!! Nota:

  • Don Frankel

    Muse, excellent points! A_____ K_____ R_____ obviously did not do well in Bombs 101 when he was over there in Afghanistan. Then again it could be the schools over there. Perhaps Afghanistan has some of the same education problems we have and A_____ K___ R_____ went to the same school as the shoe bomber and the underwear bomber. But either way as we point out here, there is nothing to worry about. He’s caught and it’s all over.

    Go about your business.

    Go to work. Go to the park. Go to the ballgame. And, most of all, go shopping.

    Don’t worry, be happy.

  • Don,

    Well, I’m retired, don’t go to parks, or ballgames (too expensive), or shopping unless it’s for groceries. However, I am whistling past the graveyard now! 🙁

    Mark

  • I always wondered why there were so few underwear bombers. But then I figured, you know, Darwin.

  • Don Frankel

    I just saw these comments here. Hello Krystal welcome aboard but who’s Lew?

  • Don Frankel

    Mark, don’t whistle and don’t worry. Nothing’s going on here. Fuggettaboutittt!

  • Don Frankel

    Richard the IVth I always thought the dearth of underwear bombers stemmed from the fact that we guys have a tendency to unconsciously adjust are stuff down there and well if they did that at the wrong time they might go BOOM and sort of defeat the whole purpose.

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