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Fake News, Now and Then

We got to thinking that maybe Fake News is nothing new, so we took a look back.

Teddy Roosevelt and his Rough Riders actually charged up Kettle’s Hill but since the War took place in Cuba and Kettle’s Hill sounds like some place in New Jersey, charging up San Juan Hill sounded a lot better.  And, who would want to watch a movie or read about the Gunfight at the empty lot alongside Fly’s Photo Studio?  That’s how it became The Gunfight at the O.K. Corral.  So, when we stop to think about it, Fake News not only sounds better than the real thing but it’s heroic, glorious and it makes you the consumer, feel better too.

With that in mind we have some headlines.

PUTIN TO RUN AGAIN FOR PRESIDENT OF RUSSIA

Trump pledges support saying.  “You fixed our election, we’ll fix yours”.

AL FRANKEN RESIGNS FROM THE SENATE

Later he is heard saying to his staff.  “But I didn’t say when.  I’m smart enough.  I’m good enough and doggone it people like me.”

THE NEW NORMAL

As wild fires sweep across southern California and people run for their lives, their Governor Jerry Brown said.  “This is the new normal.”  He went on to explain that it was all due to global warming, which makes sense to us.  The planet is warming, bleep is getting hot and pretty soon poof!

BOMB GOES OFF IN TIMES SQUARE!  NEW YORKERS INJURED!

It seems Akayed Ullah an erstwhile terrorist, planned to detonate bombs in Times Square.  But on his way to Times Square, his bomb went off in his belt and he wound up face down on the floor near the A Train exit, which is not Times Square.  So he didn’t’ quite make it.  The bomb it turns out was just a big firecracker.  And the injuries that it caused turned out to be a ringing in the ears of nearby commuters.  It’s the kind of thing that happens on July 4th or it can happen if you stand on a subway platform for too long.  And since it was more like a cherry bomb, Akayed Ullah is not injured too badly.  He just has a belly ache.  But while he lay on the floor, some New Yorkers without access to Fake News had no idea that he was a, would be terrorist bomber.  They just thought he was another homeless person, lying on the subway floor.  They threw him some change.  And, someone left him their Mickey D’s big breakfast.

Yes, we checked, Akayed Ullah gets to keep the Big Breakfast and of course, he can keep the change.

Dicens simile factum est

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5 comments to Fake News, Now and Then

  • Don, Yogi Berra caught on to fake news over 30 years ago when he said, “I really didn’t say everything I said.” At least, it was reported that he said that, but it could’ve been fake news (not that I don’t trust that Yogi said he didn’t say everything he said, because if Yogi said it, you can bank on it that he may have said it).

    P.S. Apologies for changing the subject, but are you able to access Cahill’s website? I haven’t been able to for over 24 hours; he tells me via email that it was down for a while but back on yesterday. I still can’t get it.

  • Don Frankel

    Muse, Yogis is the perfect guy to quote here. I’m pretty sure he said “I didn’t say all the things I said.” because it was too easy to just attribute things to him. Also he had such a pleasant demeanor that it would make you smile if you thought he said it as opposed to someone else. Yeah that’s a good example of fake news. I’ve got quite a few from just being associated with things that showed up in the news and knowing they were exaggerating or just making it up as they went. And,these weren’t stories about politics..

    Now I know Yogi said. “Some guys don’t like to swing on a 3 and 0 count, because they swing.” because I heard him say that one on TV.

    No, I can’t reach Cahill’ls site. Goggle says it’s down.

  • markscheel1

    Don and Muse,

    One of the early examples was Mark Twain’s response to the publication of his obituary: “The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” Or was that fake news? LOL

    I can’t reach Cahill’s site either???????

    Mark

  • Mark,

    There was one even before that. HIS MAJESTY’S ARMY TAKES BUNKER HILL. It was Breed’s Hill.

    Don

  • Ricardo

    The site is back. It was taken off because I had failed to prove I owned the site. After about thirty-six hours, the Net powers-that-be decided no one else could be held responsible for it, so they let me back on. Thanks for your concern, men.

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