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The First Thing, the Second Thing and One Other Thing

Many years ago way before I even got married an older guy I knew, explained a few things about cheating on your wife.  First, he explained the object was to cheat up.  By that he meant someone younger and better looking.  Otherwise, as he explained what was the point?  Now we don’t endorse cheating but as he pointed out if you get caught the penalties can range from bodily harm, think Lorena Bobbet here, to divorce and loss of half of everything.  So if you’re going to risk it, the reward should be at least worth half of it, if not all of it.  Now I thought of that older guy last week as I notice that no one, hardly ever mentions that intrepid FBI Agents and love birds Peter Strzok and Lisa Page are both married and not to each other.  And, this is the not so happy looking ménage a trios here.

Image result for peter strzok wife

Now we are not saying that Lisa Page center is the twin of Mrs. Strzok on the right but they could pass for sisters and certainly for cousins, so we have to wonder.  What was the point here?

And the second thing this older guy told me was under no circumstance should you ever admit that you are cheating.  I asked him what if your wife catches you in bed, literally in the act with the other woman.  He said you just look at her, smile and say.  “Now darling are you going to believe me or your own eyes?”  Now Special Agent Strzok has not testified as yet but when he does and he’s confronted with his own texts, we got a feeling he’ll ace that second thing, even though he missed the first one, by a mile.

And one other thing, a few weeks back after a big brouhaha, ABC cancelled the TV show ‘Rosanne’.  We suggested that they just kill off the character Rosanne and call the show something else like, ‘The Conners’ which is the name of the family in the show.  We were just trying to help and guess what?  ABC is going to bring the show back without Rosanne and call it ‘The Conners’.  Obviously like you and a lot of people, the head honchos at ABC read this column.  And, that’s why we’re here, to help.

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4 comments to The First Thing, the Second Thing and One Other Thing

  • Speaking of cheating on your wife, the CAPITOL STEPS political satire troup was in town over the weekend, and one of their skits involved players dressed ‘over-the-top’ as The Donald and Stormy Daniels doing a scene to the tune of STORMY WEATHER. Needless to say, it alone was worth the price of admission, which I didn’t have to pay anyway because it was a belated Father’s Day treat from my oldest daughter.

  • Muse, only two Presidents got caught in the act. Warren G. Harding and HisBubbaness. Maybe there was somebody else. I’m not sure. But when Thomas Jefferson ran for President his opponents made the outrageous claim that he was having sexual relations with one of his slaves! The audacity. But then that turned out to be true. But all the other peccadilloes we know about happened post factum.

    44 men have been President and if you rounded up 44 guys off the street my guess would be that half of them cheated on their wives. That’s just a guess. But for the last twenty something years friends of HIsBubbaness have been telling us, it was only sex and who are we to argue.

  • markscheel1

    Don,

    That “one other thing” really amazes me. You were “right on top” of it all (no pun intended). However, now there’s “still another thing”–Roseanne is talking about getting her own “new show.” Not sure if it involves the FBI, but might possibly involve Trump in some way? Stay on top and keep us posted.

    Mark

  • Don Frankel

    Mark,
    Funny and a great idea. Let’s see Rosanne, the FBI, President the Donald Himself… hmmm. Hey let’s throw in some Russians and Comey! How is this not a hit?
    Don

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